Anddddd, Take Two!

When I first told my parents that I wanted to try publishing my romantasy novel, they were extremely supportive but also asked me if I was okay with rejection. They asked me if I was ready to see bad reviews of my story.

Not everyone will love my story. My characters won’t be for everyone…and that is okay. I love it, and that’s what matters. So yes, I was ready to face those rejections, and one-star Goodreads reviews (complete with imbedded gifs and memes). And I did get rejected by several publishers before getting signed…but I was prepared to get them.

Yet, for as much as I was prepared to face rejection, and people disliking my work, nobody could have prepared me for the crazy plot twist that was this week.

My publisher closed on April 6^th, about four months before my release, and this was extremely unexpected. I can’t even begin to describe what it feels like to think you’re so close to getting the dream you’ve had for years, only to be sent ten steps back again. I thought I’d get to see some amazing art for my cover by the end of the month. By the end of May, I was going to have a physical proof of my book in my hand…and now I won’t, and thinking about that was devastating.

I realized around this time last year that I didn’t actually want to do my undergrad degree for the rest of my life, and this book was supposed to be the beginning of me starting over. But even as I was crying on my bed Monday night, I was thinking “Okay, how do I fix it?” I started thinking of everything I did have behind me in order to fix it: the line edits from my old publisher, a spreadsheet of every literary agency in the US that I got from a “job” I had for three weeks (a longer story than you may think), and a sizable following on my social media accounts.

So, after taking Tuesday as a mental health day (and having my mom visit me so we could cry together instead of over the phone), I hit the ground running again on Wednesday...and felt infinitely better once I started doing things to fix everything.

I’m not afraid of rejections. I’m not afraid of setbacks. And believe it or not, I can’t wait to read my first one-star Goodreads review…because that’s how I’ll know I’ve made it.